#Not saying who's being reincarnated but HEY our boy lives hundreds of years it could be ANYONE AMIRITE

[hellsingmongrel]

Goddamn, Trigun Fam, you guys are just determined to fuckin’ kill me with these reincarnation AU fics, aren’t you???  I literally cannot start reading one without devolving into a blubbering mess before things have even started, how do you guys always do it???  I’m going to turn into a fuckin’ mummy if I keep crying this hard!

[livinginncity]

if we were human

♚: lee rang x reader

❡: fluff??(angst, pure angst)

ⱳƈ: 2.5k

⚠︎: besides it being really bad? none really. like, literally a couple swears. it was fluff, and then it became angst, so...sorry, but not really because if i’m crying, so are you.

children could be heard all around the park. some screaming and laughing as they run behind, others crying after they tripped, only to soon be comforted by the gentle holds and hushed assurances of their mothers and fathers. a bit further away was a small dog park, from which came all kinds of barks and growl, as well as cooing of the passerby. and there at a bench, located slightly closer to the swings and slides attracting the younger humans, sat a man that looked less than pleased to be where he was.

“Guess who.” a female’s voice rang out as a soft hand covered his eyes. he merely rolled his eyes beneath their new coverings and proceeded to drag the small wrist away from his face. “y/n.”

the young woman sneered and scoffed before yanking her hand out of his grasp to walk around and join him on the bench. “I don’t like you.”

“I don’t like you either.” a smack to the back of the man’s head could be felt soon after the words left his mouth. “Yah!”

“What are you doing here anyway? I never took you for the people watching type.”

“That's because I'm not. As if they deserve that much attention.” a hand lazily lifted in the direction of a familiar little boy, the action bringing a smile to the woman’s face.

“Ahhhh. But that one’s the exception? I thought you didn’t like little kids with runny noses, something I heard you have in common with your brother actually. Is that a gumiho thing or a family thing?” the man she addressed turned his head to look at her with an unimpressed look.

“Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much? Or that you ask too many questions?”

“Well considering that was one of the first things you said to me when we met, I’ll just assume you know the answer to that already.”

she turned to look where the man’s gaze had previously been fixed and he followed suit. their eyes moved as they followed the movements of the young boy whose energy seemed to rival that of a puppy’s. ‘how fitting’ was the thought that came to the pair. minutes passed before they changed positions—the girl moving to settle her head on her company’s shoulder. said company shook her off before she repeated the action, leaving her be the second time. and he stayed in place even after she dragged his head to rest upon her own.

“Rang-ah.” the man simply grunted in response, urging her to continue. “I hate this.”

his eyebrows furrowed slightly at the sudden proclamation. “The kids? The families? Parks? I don’t really like them either. The first are messy and demanding, the second is an extremely unrealistic dynamic, and the last are way too loud and crowded.”

“No.” she took in her surroundings before speaking again. “This. I love all of this. I want it all. The kids are adorable and it feels so rewarding to be someone they rely on and look up to. I’ve had my fair share of family drama, but I’ve always wanted my own that I could cherish—pointless fights and all. And parks are probably one of my favorite places because it gives me everything I need to imagine what it’d be like if I had the first two.”

“What?” at her words he lifted his head to look down at her.

“I hate all of this shit that’s going on right now. It was one thing when you were just this occasional menace to your brother, but now the Imugi is involved and Lee Yeon refuses to let Ji Ah go again. It’s caused so many problems and with them, questions to be asked. Things could be so much simpler. Don’t you ever think about what life would be like if we were all human? This would all just be some petty high school drama. Like, Lee Yeon got class president in school and now, years later, both he and Imugi are CEOs competing in the nightclub industry or something like that.”

“You’re starting to sound like Lee Yeon. I guess you’re just as lame as him. Or maybe even lamer because really? That’s the best you can do with this fake drama?”

“Did I ever tell you that I ran into Soo Ho before you got the Tiger’s Brow back from him?” she ignored the questions, but her own annoyed him slightly. before he could respond. “I asked him if I could try them on and walked to the nearest window I could see myself in.”

“So, what’d you see? What were you? A Snake? A rat? Pufferfish?” her only response to his teasing was a pinch to the side. she shook her head before continuing.

“I saw a child.” her face changed to a solemn one. “All I saw was a snot-nosed little kid that the world seemed to have it out for. I didn’t even live long enough to have many firsts. And no one was ever there for the few I did. Well, there was one. Towards the end, I think my final year, I met an old lady. She lived alone, but she took me in the moment we crossed paths. She gave me my own room, let me help her cook, as much as a child could help, and she would always tell me these stories of her husband who had passed about a decade before. In just a few months, that woman gave me what felt like a lifetime of love. All while I was slowly dying, she made me forget the hardships, the neglect, the hatred, and by some cruel fate, she died first. But before she went, she said to me “treat my death as not another result of this terrible world, but take it as a sign that even when we know that our end is inescapable, we are able to cherish the temporary moments in which we are truly happy should we allow ourselves that much.” And so,”

the woman finally lifted her head from the gumiho’s shoulder to look into his eyes. “I think, if I could be reincarnated as a human again, I would. But since it’s probably never gonna happen I want to live like one. Get married, have a family, get mad when someone doesn’t show up for the holidays. I don’t know if I’d make it as a human with everything I know now, and I honestly don’t want to be human right-right now because I probably wouldn’t get to be around you. And I also just can’t imagine how you’d get by without seeing me every day.”

“Don’t act like you’re anything special.” he scoffed and looked back at the playground.

“You don’t have to admit it.” she stood up from the bench, looked over to the young boy he had taken in, and turned back. the woman grabbed his face and, after looking at the man for a few seconds, leaned in. “I know you love me.” and then she ran. “Soo Ho-ah! Let me play with you, that old fox is being mean again!”

“Yah!” he didn’t get up to chase her. she was right no matter how much he thought about it. somehow that weird girl wormed her way into the list of people he more than tolerated. and as he sat alone with his thoughts, he watched her play with the reincarnated boy, the latter seemingly winning their current sword fight.

does he ever wanna be human? no, it seems way too boring. does he like kids? he likes one, so that’s good enough. will he get married at some point? well, it’s just some rings and paper. and it’s not like he isn’t in love with that girl in the park.

bonus;

“Hey, y/n. If you’re watching this then...you know. I figured a couple good deeds might do me well in the afterlife, so what better way than finally letting my brother be with the girl he’s waited hundreds of years for.”

“You crazy bastard.” those were the only words that she could force her mouth to speak as she looked down at the small screen.

“I know you’re probably cursing me right now, thinking ‘this crazy bastard.’” somehow they both managed to let out a chuckle. “You know I don’t like vulgar words, but I’m not there, so i told Soo-Ho to pinch you for me every time one leaves your mouth.”

“Of course you did. It’s already a habit of his now.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye. Especially to you, Yu Ri, and Soo-Ho. I didn’t get to say thank you, either. You’ve all helped me more than I’d ever care to admit, but I really am grateful to have shared part of my life with you. I got to help Yu Ri like Lee Yeon helped me, got to meet Blacky again, and I got to experience so many things with you.”

the tears in her eyes were already brimming and it was clear they wouldn’t stay there long. “y/n.” she looked back to the screen as he called her name.

“go to the nightstand on the right of my bed and open the drawer.” the girl got up from her place at the edge of the bed and walked over to the wooden table. with her phone in her left, she used her right to open the drawer, and she could feel her heartbeat stutter as she laid her sights on the black velvet box that sat in it. she reached a shaky hand to pick it up, and when she flipped it open she couldn’t help dropping the phone as she brought the other to her mouth with a choked sob. all she could do was shake her head and let the tears subject themselves to gravity.

“Do you remember that day in the park?” despite not being able to actually see through the endlessly flowing tears, she managed to scramble around and find the device that had slipped from her grasp. “You were talking about all this stuff like marriage, family, kids—what it’d be like to be human because things would be so much simpler. And while I don’t think anyone could ever convince me that being human would be fun, I figured we could at least do some of those human things. We were kind of halfway there, you know? You practically live in my apartment, and Soo-Ho took over the living room with his toys, so it was only a matter of time for him to get his own room so I could stop stepping on legos—maybe get a door with a lock from the outside so I don’t have to worry about waking up covered in stickers.”

she laughed as she recalled the memory, his interactions with the little boy, and their goofy smiles when things were calm for once. “You dorks were made to follow each other into every life.”

“I was gonna propose to you after this whole thing was over. Once I knew Lee Yeon was safe and not being targeted by a wannabe dragon. I’m sorry I couldn’t give that to you or...our own kid, though I think the one we have now is pretty great. And I’m also really sorry that I’m finally telling you this once it’s too late, but you were right. About what you said that day.” her breath hitched as she saw the tears glisten while they slid down his face. “I love you.

as if it were clockwork, a sob made its way from her throat and the tears began again.

“Yah, stop crying already. Please. I’d be upset if I was the cause of it.” and she tried, she really did, but it wasn’t as easy as he made it sound. “And, I know this is probably asking a lot for all that I’ve put you through, but can you wear it? At least for a little bit. Just think of it as a way of honoring my memory—the better parts obviously. You can keep my apartment if you want, too. Soo-Ho might be a job better-fit for Sin-Ju and Yu Ri, but if he says he wants to stay with you, you better let him.”

another laugh emitted from between the sobs as she listened to his final message.

“I really do love you, y/n. And if there is ever a chance of us finding each other again, I’ll tell you every chance I get. Anyway, I think it’s time for me to go now. I only have a couple more minutes and I don’t think the others are gonna make it in time. I’m scared if I’m being honest, y/n. I’m afraid of being alone, but you helped me not feel like that all the way up to the end—I finally had a family. So thank you. Love you.” and he smiled his big, child-like smile before adding on, “And don’t tell Lee Yeon I said sorry, or thank you, or I love you that much in under ten minutes.”

and just like that, it was over. no more, dumb family feuds, no more naengmyeon with no eggs because someone would always steal it, no more Lee Rang. she stared at the paused screen for what felt like hours before setting it to the side on the bed, to do as he had asked. carefully,  she took the ring out from the safety of its cushions and slid it onto her left hand. she let out a shaky breath as she stared at her ring finger and she said it back, hoping that somehow, someway, he would hear it. “I love you too, Lee Rang-ah.”

it was a while before she moved from that spot—getting on her feet only to answer the door that had just rung. opening it, she could have seen the man who had taken the place of Lee Rang’s in the living world, but all she saw at that moment was an older brother who had also lost someone he loved.

“Lee Yeon-ah.” it was then that the male finally took in her appearance. she wore jeans, one of his brother’s sweaters, and her hair was in a bun that had clearly seen better days. but what really caught his attention as his eyes traveled, was the black box in her right hand, and shining silver band on her left. then he lifted his eyes back to hers to see just how tired she was. “Lee Yeon-ah. I miss him.”

the man simply brought her into his chest as she sobbed. and she cried, and she cried, and all the while he stood there with her in his embrace. it was all he could do, he couldn’t offer her words of comfort just yet because, even now she may be much stronger than he is. because she’s strong enough to live without the promise of his reincarnation. she knows she may never see him again, but won’t risk exchanging her life just so he won’t go through the same thing.

“I miss him so much.” her voice cracked as the words came out, and he ran his hand over her hair.

“I know, I know. I miss him, too.”

[violetwolfraven]

Peace and Joy

@spot-king-of-brooklyn I’m your secret Santa! @newsies-secretsanta

You said your favorite ships are sprace and/or javid and you’re good with pretty much anything so I’m gonna write two separate vaguely holiday-related oneshots in the reincarnation AU. Don’t worry though nothing heavy, just fluff. No COVID because I’ve had enough of that dude and I say so. Enjoy! Happy Holidays!

Tw: referenced past period-typical homophobia.

...

Spot couldn’t remember being this happy... ever. Not in the early 1900s or in the early 2000s.

Well, the closest he could think of was 1902, when he and Race moved on from being newsies and from being leaders of their respective boroughs and rented that old apartment in Brooklyn together. But that had been muted by the need to be careful. They couldn’t be normal young people in love because they always had to hide.

And that was fine at the time because it was expected. It was them doing whatever it took to be together not knowing they’d ever get the chance to do it another way.

Now, in the bright, beautiful, forward-thinking 21st century, they could be safe. They could be in love without fear of the consequences. They could go out Christmas shopping together, and Spot didn’t know if that counted as a date, but it kind of felt like one as he watched his boyfriend bop a little to Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You as he looked around.

He ended up having to look away before he started blushing too hard. Even if he wasn’t the King of Brooklyn this time, he still had a bit of a reputation as a stone cold badass. For all he knew, one or more of their more mischievous friends could be spying on them right now. And besides, this thrift store probably had stuff he could get the few Brooklyn kids who’d come back, too.

He was still deciding if Hotshot would think it was funny if he got him a tank top that said ‘hot stuff’ on it. The others would find it funny, but Spot honestly wasn’t sure if it would make his former second uncomfortable.

“Hey, Spottie, ya think my little brother would like this?”

Spot turned back to see Race holding up a bright purple worm on a string, but a giant version of one. One that was big enough to be a scarf.

“Knowin’ your family,” he admitted, “I think any of ‘em would be happy to get one of those.”

It was true. Honestly, the most sensible Larkin brother was the second-oldest, Crutchie, but Spot could still see him proudly wearing a worm-on-a-string-scarf to school after winter break ended.

Besides him, Medda, Race’s mom, tended to embrace whatever unique fashion choice she could find. And Jack, of course, didn’t let being the oldest of four stop him from being a theatrical little shit who liked drawing attention to himself.

And Romeo was somehow even more eccentric than Race, so he would definitely like that thing.

Race grinned, “I’m gonna get Ro a worm scarf for Christmas.”

“Your family is ridiculous.”

“Thank you. So, what’re ya gettin’ for Denton?”

Oh, shit. Spot had completely forgotten about getting anything for Denton.

He really should get something for him. After all, the teacher hadn’t even known Spot when Jack asked if he could stay with him. All he’d needed to know was that Spot needed a place to hide from his terrible parents and couldn’t stay with the Larkins, mostly because Medda had a strict rule about her boys’ partners sleeping over unless it was absolutely necessary. (it was also because Spot couldn’t think of anyone he’d want to live with less than Jack Kelly, but Denton didn’t really need to know that, did he?)

So far, Spot’s parents hadn’t shown any signs of missing him, and Spot couldn’t decide if that hurt or not, but it barely mattered anymore.

Because Denton didn’t really have any rules beyond ‘do your homework’, ‘take a shower occassionally’, and ‘if you leave the house, let me know where you’re going.’ He helped Spot pick out a Halloween costume, let him spend Thanksgiving with Race, and gave him money for Christmas shopping. He was fine with Spot being gay and having a boyfriend, even if there was an added rule with that of ‘you can’t have the door closed if you’re alone in your room with Race.’

He gave Spot space, but also made it clear that he could come to him for anything he needed help with. He never hit him, never pushed when Spot wanted to be alone, never even raised his voice unless they were in an already-loud room and he needed to get his attention.

In short, in only a few months, he’d become the best adult Spot had ever had in his life. He wasn’t his father, but he was closest thing Spot had ever gotten to a dad.

The Denton they’d known in their last life had been kind of like that, too. He’d helped as best he could whenever one of the newsies got into trouble, always being there for anyone who needed him since Kath first introduced her new reporter friend to her newsie friends. Of course, Spot hadn’t been living with Denton then, so he’d never really thought about it.

“What do you even get a middle-aged man for Christmas?”

Race shrugged, “Power tools?”

The idea of getting Denton power tools was so ridiculous that they both laughed.

“Uh... he’s a writer,” Race pointed out, “So... fancy pens?”

“Fancy pens? We’re at a thrift store, Racer.”

“Well we don’t gotta stay here forever. There’s a Barnes and Noble across the street.”

He wasn’t wrong about that, but Spot wasn’t sure about the whole ‘fancy pen’ thing. It seemed a little generic.

“Yooooo! Spot, check this out for Jack!”

He was holding up a bright blue sketchbook that said ‘Sketchy Bitch’ on the cover.

“Oh yeah, ya definitely have to get that for Cowboy.”

Spotting (no pun intended) something else on the shelf behind him, Spot grinned.

He had the perfect thing to get for the man who’d taken him in.

...

“This is gonna be so fuckin’ awesome.”

Davey snorted, “You’re way too excited ‘bout this, Jackie.”

He loved his boyfriend, but he had a tendency to get overenthusiastic about things.

Well, he loved that about Jack, too. And he loved being able to call him his boyfriend, now. That they didn’t need to hide this time.

He and Sarah had both been a little worried about their parents’ reaction, but it had turned out to be for nothing. They’d each gotten a t-shirt with their respective pride flag for the first night of Hanukkah, and Jack and Kath were always welcome to come over as long as at least one parent was home.

Davey loved Jack just as much in this lifetime as he had in his first, but it was different, not having to hide it. It was good different, but definitely different. Being able to be who they were and be in love and knowing that it was generally frowned upon to be homophobic now, at least where they lived.

And being able to do random shit that was romantic and fun as hell, but not something would even occur to most people to do.

After a sleepy conversation once Crutchie, Race, and Romeo had fallen asleep watching White Christmas (which Davey appreciated for the choreography in the dance numbers) one time about how there weren’t really any Hanukkah movies, Jack had collaborated with Kath to write a lesbian Hanukkah musical romcom to post to YouTube.

Objectively, it wasn’t that great. It was good for a movie made by a bunch of high school juniors, but they couldn’t afford good cameras or microphones or anything. Plus, it was appealing to a very niche audience, so Davey doubted this movie would get more than twenty views.

Still, it meant a lot that Jack was so excited about it, that he was working so hard on props and editing in the lighting and music for it so Kath and Saz could play Jewish lesbians fake-dating at a holiday party who fall in love. It was cute.

“It ain’t gonna win any awards,” Jack admitted, “But I think we’s got somethin’ good here!”

“We do,” Davey agreed.

Was he actually talking about the romcom starring his sister and her girlfriend? Partially. It was a pretty good movie for something produced by teenagers.

But they had something good there that wasn’t on the screen of Jack’s laptop, too.

Jack seemed to share those thoughts, with the way he was smiling.

“What’s with the look, mi amor?”

Davey rolled his eyes as the other boy put his arm around his waist.

“Like you don’t know, love,” he chuckled, “Remember the last time we did somethin’ like this? And by ‘we’ I mean ‘you.’”

“Shh,” Jack shook his head, “Nope. We don’t talk about the latkes incident.”

“You mean when you almost burned down our tiny little kitchen trying to—“

“We don’t talk about it!”

Davey laughed. It was funny, how Jack couldn’t, in any lifetime, cook anything more complicated than like... chili or stew. While he could make something edible, he couldn’t make anything that was really considered good.

“Davey, love, luz de mi vida, it was literally over a hundred years ago, so stop. Bringin’. Up. The. Latkes. Incident!”

He punctuated the sentence by hitting Davey with one of his mom’s throw pillows.

“Okay, Jackie, I get it! Stop hitting me!”

“Fine,” Jack grinned, “I ain’t almost burned down a kitchen in over a century, babe. I thinks that’s a good record to have.”

“Most people never almost burn down a kitchen,” Davey pointed out, “I know I—wait, did you just call me ‘babe’?”

Jack was definitely not meeting his eyes to try to hide how he was blushing, “Uh... is that okay?”

Davey smirked. Jack didn’t get flustered that often, but it was adorable when he did.

And even if he had almost burned down their apartment, it had been cute back then, how he’d tried so hard to try to do something nice for Davey for the holiday season. It was cute now, too.

That was one thing that hadn’t changed through the decades, he guessed.

“It’s definitely okay, babe.”

...

“Spot, is this a... ‘Best Dad In The World’ mug?”

“...if you cry, I’m outta here.”

[whyralltheusernamestaken]

Curse

Where she's cursed with immortality so she chases around the reincarnations of her first love over and over again and the one time she’s decided to give up, it just happens to be an explosive blonde.

Warning : none!

Words : 6590 (wtf my goal was 3000)

Masterlist 

A/N : Thank you all for being so patient. The ending is kinda rushed, but I hope you enjoy!

Quirks had left an undeniable mark on the face of society. It just came one day and slapped some magical powers on to someone and left just as quickly, with no explanation whatsoever. No one knew why, or how. Nothing could've hinted to the appearance of quirks and none of the decades of research that followed had any more insight into the matter. Y/N was quirkless. Immortal yes, but she had no quirk of herself. She was born a thousand and so years ago, in Japan, and within a decade or two, became known throughout the lands for her immaculate beauty and poise. She became an object of affection for thousands, and one of the men happened to be the emperor. Bakugou Katsuki. He had approached her presence with the sole intent of adding the most beautiful woman in the world to his harem. He was an arrogant and prideful noble, and the thought of her in his grasp has excited him to no end. He could then prance around with his head held up so high that people would crane their necks to meet his eyes. He smugly grinned at the idea of her clinging to his arm, or for her to be waiting for him back at the palace with the rest of his concubines. He flooded her with extravagant gifts, compliments and praises, small private dates in a back garden of the palace, away from prying eyes and complaints of Bakugou's other dozen girls. She had been easily wooed, being kept away from suitors from an early age, the emperor had certainly been her first escape into romance and she was ecstatic. Her parents had gleamed at the idea of her being with the most powerful man in all of Japan, and had given her away to the palace at the first suggestion of the emperor's affection. 

He had fallen in love with her, not only her beauty but her personality, her small habits and her other mannerisms. It wasn't his initial plan, he had only wanted to add her presence into his long list of women, that he had reassured the other women, but his heart can softened considerably and he had fallen hard. Anyone around the emperor could see that, even the towns' people were gossiping about it. The other concubines too, quickly caught on. She was a woman of absolute beauty, only a few hairs short of Y/N's, a princess of a famous descent from China, promised to be married to the emperor. He had taken a liking to her because like himself, she too had a quirk, which was still a very rare trait to have at the time. One of curses, sure it was evil in nature, but she had proven to be a responsible and respected lady. It all turned sour when her fiance liked another woman. In her rage, she had cursed the younger woman. The aforementioned girl had been told what had been done by the princess, by the sobbing and apologetic woman herself, but she was clueless to what extent this curse was. She had forgiven the princess straight away, an act of kindness that the nobles had shined to and the emperor had simply fell more in love with her for. But as countless years went by, she stayed the same. She then truly realised the horrors of her curse and at that moment in time, she wished she hadn't been so naive, so kind to just forgive the woman who left her life in ruins. The curse was one of immortality. Something she couldn't escape even after the princess had passed away. To watch her lovers grow up and prosper, only to stay the same young woman when she watched they started to wilt and eventually die.   And so here she was. An entity of over a thousand years old and yet she remained the same bubbly and happy woman on the outside, smiling brightly at the cameras as she walked around the towns. Everyone in Japan knew of her. Not only did her predicament attract the attention of the public, she was also the CEO of Japan's most well known and successful hero agency. She had set up the agency with her husband, Katsuki, a mere 18 years ago, before he was killed in one of the largest villain attacks in Japan history 2 years after it opened. They had employed All Might when he was in his younger days as well as worked with all of the top 10 heroes, and after his death, she become the sole chairman of the agency. And thanks to the technology present in the modern day, those who weren't previously interested in her at least knew her name. There was then the nickname the media had given her after she had survived the attack : ‘The Undead Hero.’ She sure as hell wasn’t a hero. For god’s sake she was quirkless! But the internet took joy to praising her successes within the hero world. And as a joke, an online petition started for her to become licensed pro hero and the people in charge decided there'd be no harm, since she can't die and all, in making her one, titling her in as Pro Hero Number Zero. So here you were, the country's first quirkless pro hero. ~~~ You had watched the UA sports festival, looking for students to intern here at your company. One certain blonde had caught your eye but you felt yourself flinch at the mention of his full name. It had certainly been a long time since the last time you met another reincarnation of your first love. There had been many different personalities before and the situation you met him in varied to such extent that you had given up with the idea of repeatedly seeking him out and your last encounter with him, or his spirit at least, was your breaking point. You have a good 16 years to grieve his unfortunate and untimely death but even the ten hundred years you were alive wasn't enough time for you to forget and move on. It seemed that you had a curse where you could never escape your one lover, but maybe that was the package deal with immortality. "We're definitely sending an offer out to him right boss?" your assistant, Naomi asked, writing down that all so familiar name down on a notepad. "Up to you, I'm taking a break." you replied, standing up and walking away from the big screen. You knew her eyes softened as she watched your figure retreat out of the room, after all she was there with you after your husband died. Your husband, the one who shared the same name as the boy mentioned. "Alright I'll send you the list later." she replied softly, before turning her attention back to the live broadcast, which now showed a green haired boy. "Thanks. I'll look over it and then you can send out the offers tomorrow." you said before completely leaving the room. It had been a week since the sports festival and it was time for the internships. You had a very important meeting in the morning, causing you to regrettably miss welcoming the trainee heroes to your agency. Standing up, you voiced your thanks and bowed, to which the other businessmen and women returned the guesture.

"I'll be expecting to see you soon." you smiled as Naomi showed then out. "Of course." one of them replied, smiling once more before all of them left the building. Waiting for them to disappear completely from sight, you turned back around. "Alright, what's next?" you asked, looking over. "Next we need to speak to the interns. Briefly would be fine but we need a positive review of our work place." she replied and started walking away, to which you followed. "Of course." you replied curtly. To be frank, you didn't need her to remind you how to keep up the reputation, after all you had been running the agency for almost 20 years but you bit your tongue as you didn't want her to feel as if her work was unwelcome. She was a great assistant and you knew that you needed her and her abilities. Turning the corner, someone roughly crashed you into you, sending you tumbling back a few steps. "Watch it." they snapped, sending to you a glare. "E-excuse me." Naomi stuttered. She wasn't too intimidated by the way the young boy was fuming, instead at her bosses reaction. You had a vendetta against extremely rude people and she braced herself for an ugly ending. "What?" he scowled, turning to send her a nasty look before he turned his attention back to you. You pursed your lips, unsure whether to snap back or not as you didn't want to cause a scene. The meeting had taken much longer than expected. It was only two in the afternoon but all you wanted to do was sleep, but you needed to meet the interns and consolidate the arrangements with the other heroes that worked here. "Well are you going to say anything?" he asked. "Why are you just standing there like a idiot?" "Young boy I don't think that's very appropriate to say to someone." Naomi said quietly, eyes flickering to observe your reaction. "Well it's true isn't it." You let out a sigh, deciding to not waste your energy on anything out of your plan, especially people who were unnecessarily rude. "Hey, don't ignore me." he shouted as you walked past him, your assistant shuffling behind you. You walked briskly towards the training halls, ignoring his shouts for you to acknowledge him. He eventually stopped to pick up a phone call but at that point you had already walked down two corridors, too far away to hear him stop shouting profanities at you. You pushed open the doors to the largest training hall in your building, leaning on the wall next to the door as you watched several people combat each other. You had stayed there for no more than a minute or too when the fuming blonde stomped back in. A green haired boy, Midoriya was it, waved excitedly at the him, but he simply flipped him over, moving over to the side of the hall. If they had any more interactions planned, they had to be stopped there as one of the heroes spotted you, quickly shouting for everyone to come over and you slowly walked onto on of the courts. "I'm glad you to see that none of you are slacking off." you announced loudly, your eyes scanning over the small crowd of people. "Of course not boss." a young hero replied. You smiled at her with a small nod. "Boss?" someone shouted and you turned slightly to spot the blonde from earlier, his mouth hung open. "It's nice to meet you Bakugou-san." you said, a small bitter edge to your words before you turned back to the rest, a large smile on your face. "Good afternoon everyone, it's a shame I wasn't able to welcome you this morning, I hope there hasn't been any trouble. My name is Y/N and I'm incredibly pleased that you chose to intern at my agency." "Y/N!" Midoriya shouted, a look of glee filling his face. "You're my favourite hero, I love you so much." he shouted, jumping up and down in excitement. The gesture from the boy made you grin even wider. It was almost as if some of his endless energy had been transferred to you. "That makes me very happy, thank you Midoriya." "She knows my name!" he shouted, earning a few praises and snickers. "Shut up Deku." Bakugou seethed. He was fuming at the thought of you. He had not only completely embarrassed himself in front of you, but also insulted you, the CEO! He cursed himself for not researching prior to this, but the fact that you seemed so young to him gave no implications that you were the big boss of this place. "Alright." you shouted, clapping your hands together. "Let's get this show on the road." ~~~ Midoriya had fallen asleep extremely quickly, a small 'good night Kacchan' and he had been out like a light. But the same had not befallen Bakugou and instead he stayed awake, shifting and turning restlessly as he lay on the bottom bunk. After a few more moments of him lying wide awake, he shuffled out of his bed and left the room. He walked down the corridor, planning to head towards the kitchen when he spotted a light on. It was indeed the same direction in which he wished to go so he followed it. Stepping inside the room, he saw you sat on the couch. Your back was to him and you were muttering something. As he got closer, he made out the words falling from your mouth. "He loves me, he loves me not." He turned around to exit the room, sure that you wanted nothing but space, but his foot slipped slightly and he fell slightly, cursing. You jumped at the sound behind you. "Oh I'm sorry, did I wake you up?" you asked, looking up and around at him with a sniffle. Your cheeks were flush and the tip of your nose red, a few stray tears resting on your cheeks. Bakugou stood their awkwardly as you wiped your sleeve across your eyes and cheeks. He didn't know what to do in this situation. He hadn't comforted someone in years, always opting to leave his group of friends to take care of a problem, only ever observing from the side line. "D-do you want to talk about it?" he asked quietly. He tried to make sure his words were more gentle than usual, careful not to make you start crying again. Your eyes widened at his questioned but you slowly nodded. Patting the space next to you on the couch, you smiled slightly. "Have a seat Bakugou." You laughed at the irony. Here you were crying about your deceased husband as his reincarnation sat beside you, offer on the table to listen to your troubles. Your mind began to wander at the word troubles. What exactly in your life was going wrong? It was a simple answer really, everything. "So how are you?" you asked, breaking the silence. He blinked a couple times in confusion. "I'm good." he answered slowly, his voice low and hushed. "Well that's good." you nodded turning back to the lonesome rose stem in your hand that you had been previously picking the petal off from. "So why are you up?" you asked. Bakugou at this point was lost for words. Wasn't you the one who had been crying? Why were you so intrigued in asking him questions? "Couldn't sleep." he muttered, a glare on his face as he stared forwards at the coffee table, trying desperately to understand you. "Fair enough." you hummed, turning to look in the same direction as him, your eyes landing on your untouched mug of hot chocolate. "Do you want a drink?" you asked, gesturing to the mug on the table. "I haven't drank from it yet." Bakugou nodded, after all he had come out of his room for the hopes of getting a drink. "Thanks." he muttered. You watched as the boy brought the mug up to his lips and you thought back to your previous encounter with his spirit. "He liked hot chocolate too." you mumbled, turning away and back at the rose stem. "Did you say something?" he asked, mug in hand as he sent you a glance. You pursed your lips, taking a moment before shaking you head. "No, it was... nothing." you trailed off. "Well you accepted my offer so you'd better start talking." he scoffed, but his angry facade was falling apart almost as quickly as he started it and he was sure you could see through it, but you decided not to comment on it. And so you spent the rest of your night with Bakugou. He had proven to be much more thoughtful than you had imagined, less rude and obnoxious, which you were grateful for. It was obvious that he hadn't recognised you during your first encounter, and more than likely did not know about your immortality. You didn't need any more pity for that. So you talked about your husband, to an extent, keeping away from mentioning his name, instead reminiscing the memories you had with him. The younger boy listened, nodding and throwing in small comment here and there. The two of you exchanged a few more words after that topic, but in an hour or two, it was a simple silence. He had fallen asleep next to you, a peaceful look on his face. You got up and cleaned away the mug and flower petals, before returning to your room to get a blanket. Laying it gently on him, you took the liberty to press a kiss to his forehead before leaving, turning off the lights. "Sleep well Katsuki." ~~~ Bakugou was needless to say, very disappointing that he had barely seen you all week. He understood that you had a lot on your plate running a business, but a part of him had hoped that after your emotional night with him on the first day, you would at least take some time to say hello to him. He had went to the living room a further 5 more times, hoping that you would be there waiting for him. But he found himself being disappointed time and time again when he saw that there was no room with a light on in the corridor. Today was his last day of fully interning, he was due to leave the following morning and although he could say he was very happy to leave the other bastards in the company behind, he couldn't say the same for you. In truth, he had formed a small interest in you. Call it a crush or whatever, it wasn't as if he would say it out loud. Sure you had a pretty face and all, that much he would admit, but he was genuinely confused by your appearance. You said you had been running the agency for almost 20 years but you didn't look anywhere near your 40s? That had greatly puzzled the explosive boy. "Deku." he shouted, catching the attention of the smart boy as he was chatting with one of the heroes. "Y-yes Kacchan?" "How old do you think Y/N is?" he asked. The green haired boy gasped, shaking his head. "Kacchan! It's rude to ask about a girls age." he scolded him, to which Bakugou snorted. "But between you and me, I'd say about a thousand and one hundred?" "Are you shitting me you nerd?" he bellowed, hand raised with his palm upwards, ready to start an explosion. The hero chipped in. "I'd say so too. She's definitely over a thousand." she commented. "I think last year was her one thousand and seventyith birthday? I could be wrong, I wasn't invited to the party." she sulked. "You two are fucking joking right?" "We're not." the hero replied, furrowing her eyebrows before she let out a small gasp. "Are you telling me you've never heard of the boss?" "No. Should I have?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "Yes!" she cried out, throwing her hands up in the air, before bringing them down and massaging her forehead. "You're overreacting." Bakugou stated, giving a deadpan look to the girl as he let out a 'tch' in annoyance. "She really not Kacchan, literally everyone has heard of Y/N. She's a massive sensation in the hero community but also the beauty one, I'm not sure how you've never come across her." The truth was Bakugou had come across your name on his browser, twice, maybe three times. But most of them had popped up during the start of the school year, when Midoriya had suddenly shown up with a quirk. So as soon as he read that you were quirkless, he made sure to avoid your name like the plague. Midoriya soon left to start his patrolling, and left Bakugou standing there, thinking about you. With many more questions than he had answers. ~~~ "Y/N." he said, standing at the doorway of your office and you and your assistant stared back in confusion. "Hello there Bakugou, is there anything I can help you with?" you asked. He froze up at your question. Why was he here? He had barged past some security just a few moments prior, saying he had something urgent to talk to with the boss, but now that he was here, no excuse would pop up in his mind. "Alright Naomi, give me a few minutes." you said, handing the papers you hand in your hand off to Naomi before she nodded and left. "So." you began, leaning forwards so both your elbows were on the desk and your chin rested on the back of your intertwined fingers. "Have a seat Bakugou." You gestured to the big chair in front of your desk and he complied, sitting down in utter silence. He opened his mouth to speak but it took a few seconds for the words to come out. "I haven't seen you in a while." he blurted out. He immediately wanted to slam his head into the desk before him, cringing at his words and the smug smile that you shot him. "If I knew any better, I'd say you missed me Bakugou." “Katsuki." he corrected, eyes trailed carefully on yours. You nodded and ran a hand through your hair.

"Honestly, I'd love to stay and talk Katsuki, but I'm on a tight schedule right now." you explained, tilting your head to the side as you waited for his response. "Will I see you again tonight?" he asked, his voice so quiet that he seemed almost... shy. Your smile grew wider. "Sure thing. I'll make sure to swing around earlier so you don't need to stay up so late waiting for me." He nodded at your response and started to get up. "Tell Naomi to come back in when you leave." "Alright." he muttered, turning away towards the door. "And Katuski?" you said, earning a grunt from the younger male. "I missed you too." He quickly turned away at your statement but you could see the tips of his ears grow red. Of course you had missed him. He was the only other person you confided in about your husband other than Naomi. But it was truly Bakugou Katsuki that you had missed. His soul that you had hopelessly fell in love with over and over again. The result was always the same, and after each time, you would tell yourself that it was the last. But he would always come back. And you, once again, would fall for him, like a drug that you simply couldn't fight the addiction of. And so you braced yourself for another heartbreak. After all, it was inevitable. ~~~ Bakugou had waited for you in the living room of the dorm space he currently stayed in, a cup of chocolate in his hands and one for you placed on the coffee table. You kept to your word and came earlier. It was around 11pm when you slipped into the dorm floor of the building. Seeing the light on, you made your way quietly towards it. "Hey." you said, your voice warm and gentle as he looked up towards you, moving to hand you the mug. "Thank you." You sat down on the couch with your legs crossed and he chucked a blanket to yo, to which you laid on your lap. "Is there anything in specific you want to talk about?" "You." he stated. You hummed in response. The rest of the night he asked questions about you, your immortality and more about your latest deceased husband, who he found out the name of. He recognised the hurt that flashed in your eyes as you recalled telling him about your immortality. He had be an accepting person, loving you for you as a person and paying little to no mind to your unchanging outer appearance. At least that was what it seemed on the outside. There had been times were his act slipped and he crumbled, talking about how he wanted to grow old with you, not for you to look the same when he was in his older years and your children looked the same age as you. But of course you hadn't even gotten the chance to think about having children, setting up the agency had taken up most of your time, and which to this day you still regret. You wished you had spent more time with him, appreciating him instead of work, before his dying moment. You hadn't thought too much about things, his presence made you live in the moment, not caring about any problems or consequences as long as he was with you. But of course he wasn't. He had left too early. The younger boy had wrapped an arm around your shoulder when you began to sniffle, grabbing a box of tissues from the table for you. After he was satisfied with the amount of answers you gave him, he opened up about the guilt that he felt for All Might's retirement. He told you about the things he witnessed during the fight against All for One, how utterly useless he felt. He followed with nightmares that visited him almost every night, how he was force himself to stay awake to avoid them, causing him to form a habit of being unable to sleep. You had been so understanding and sweet that the boy couldn't help but let out a few tears, relishing in your soft touches and soothing tone that he eventually fell asleep in your arms. The following morning he waited excitedly for you too see him off along with the other heroes from your company. But you didn't come. He left in the train with a heavy heart, head titled backwards against the glass window as he thought back. He hadn't seen you in the morning, waking up alone and in his own bed. He had wandered out into the living room, hoping that your figure would be sleeping on the couch, but alas, you weren't there. His way home was unusually silent. Midoriya had definitely picked up on it but when he attempted to talk to the blonde, he only received shouts and threats. He eventually gave up, opting to leave the teen to his own devices. Once Bakugou returned home, he unpacked him clothes, throwing everything into a pile to wash. He turned every pocket inside out and when he got to his pajama bottom, a small piece of paper fell out. 'Hey sorry I had to leave so early in the morning, here's my number if you wanted to talk more. xxxxx-xxx-xxx' He instantly smiled, diving for his phone, typing your number in just as quickly before he sent you a text. ~~~ It had been a few months since the internships and Bakugou had found himself calling you on a regular basis. It would mostly be in late into the night, with you obviously busy with your agency during the daylight hours. You would talk about your day, ask him about his. He would often complain about his classmates, maybe his teacher, but on some rare occasions he would say something nice about them, like how Shitty hair had improved in combat or that Deku was getting progressively less annoying. You listened, giving him tips about a variety of things, ranging from things about the general hero world or what he should get for his pink skinned friend's birthday. And he soon found himself hopelessly falling in love with you. He hadn't planned for this to happen. Fuck, he'd sworn to himself that he wouldn't. He didn't want to have to deal with the consequences of your immortality, but he found himself crawling back to you even at a bat of your eyelashes. Your grasp on him was truly... inescapable. He had been horrified at the thought, refusing to acknowledge your existence. Your calls would go through to voicemail, your texts left unread. You didn't understand why he was ghosting you, beating yourself up about it over a few glasses of wine as you slowly sunk into sadness. It was another simply another repeated loop and you recognised all of the signs, but you felt what was left of your heart completely shatter. Sure you had previous reincarnations reject you because they disliked, or even feared, the idea of you being immortal, but they had made it clear at the beginning, not half a year into talking with you daily. Your mood soured drastically, and Naomi had tried to persuade you into talking to her, but you refused to, keeping all of your thoughts bottled up. You buried yourself with more and more work, creating a wall around you that even the one or two friends you had couldn't break down, let alone your employees. The company continued to receive praise, by media and heroes alike, but what used to be your sole joy and pride left nothing but a bitter taste in your mouth. You had gotten so used to Bakugou's company that without hearing his voice left you so empty. And to save yourself from being hurt like a broken record on repeat, you gave up on love. ~~~ It was on an interview that Bakugou witnessed the true extent of what his actions had done to you. He had the unfortunate timing of walking in when Midoriya was watching your interview live on the big screen in the common room. Bakugou had initially refused to stay, but his friends had forced him to, saying something about how he should see how his old mentor was doing. He had complained to the point where his friends willingly let him go but instead he begrudgingly stayed, standing in the corner of the room with his arms crossed as he furrowed his brows at the screen You sat across from the interviewer, a tired expression on your face as you explained the agency's plans and future aims. The other woman nodded, asking questions here and there, and then it came to the questions fans asked. "Have you been taking care of yourself?" The question caught you off guard and your breath hitched. You tried to take a deep breath in but everything around you started to blur together into nothing but a background noise. "S-sorry, could I have a moment?" you asked, but before she gave you any answer, you had already left the set. At the same time, Bakugou slipped out of the common room, his heart clenching at the terrible state you were in. When he first met you, only a few months ago, you stood high with your head help up high, a sort of excitement in your eyes, an aura of authority when you dared to ignore him! But now you were reduced to short sentences and even shorter smiles, fake and forced. And unbeknown to you, you were doing the same to him. His loud shouts had reduced to smaller, and less often sharp erratic outbursts. The distance he had put between him and his friends was almost immeasurable and none of them could reach even close enough to console him in the slightest. He had shut the world out completely, solely focusing on training and school work. He gritted his teeth as he fought back the itch to call you, but eventually he relented, taking him phone out of his pocket and dialling on your number. He sure wasn't expecting you to pick up, but when you did, his heart felt elated. "Hello?" you asked, your phone on speaker by the side as you dried your hands in the bathroom, lookign at yourself in the mirror and giving yourself an encouraging nod. "H-hi." he whispered, locking himself up in his room as he sat down on the floor, his back against the door. "I'm sorry." ~~~ He was in his early twenties, too young to be giving up what his future held. You hadn't meant to choose his path for him, but you had indirectly done so when you said no. So there he sat with his head in his hands, cheeks stained with tears and the ring somewhere lost in the corner of his room. It was selfish, you knew, but the time you spent with him only felt like a ticking bomb, each week, day, hour even, was counting down to the day in which you would lose him. And you weren't ready. He knew it was a stupid move to make. After all, you have discussed with him countless times about how scared you were to commit to a relationship you knew would once again end up in flames. "Death is inevitable." he said, watching as you fiddled with his sleeve as you laid together on the couch. "Well not for me." you countered back. "If you could remove this curse, would you?" "I don't know Katsuki. I'm honestly so scared." You shifted so your face was buried in his chest. "I've seen what death can do and I'm just so, so scared." "I want to grow old with someone I love." you continued. "I really do. But I don't know how to feel knowing that was my last few years alive. I've been around for so long that I've become afraid to die." "I'm tired of the heartbreak, but there's always a comforting moment because I know you'll come back. Sooner or later, your soul will be back in my arms, whether it takes 20 years or 200. But if I were to find a way to remove my curse and you died before me, I'd never see you again." He found himself at a lack of words that day. Nothing would leave his mouth so the only thing he could do to comfort you was to hug you even tighter. Eventually something came to his mind. "What if I just find a way to be immortal too?" he asked. You looked up at him. "That's highly illegal Katsuki. Think about it, if you could easily do that, then everyone would be able to live forever. And normally, the effect of the quirk disappears as soon as they die." He hummed in response, mood downcast that he couldn't help you in any way. He spent the rest of the night comforting you to the best of his abilities. You truly had felt better after his words, but he didn't see the subtle change in mood. He wanted to reassure you, to be someone you could rely on. But all he brought into your life was constant worry. He replayed your words in his head on a loop. He already saw this coming, but his constant refusal to acknowledge his situation had led to his downfall.   You had sent him a quick message and in the following days, you hadn't picked up his calls in days. He had called your assistant as well as visited your company, but he was told you weren’t there. He cried in anguish at how hell bent you were at avoiding him, even going to the extent of having your employees lie for you. But he soon found that they weren't lying. No one had seen you in weeks and your fans had picked up on it fairly quickly. There were articles all over the internet, forums and interviews with her assistant and closest friend. "She has left on her own accord." Naomi stated as multiple cameras flashed in her eyes. You had told her you were out to seek happiness, as vague as it had been, and that she needed to cover for you during the month or so that you were gone. That was all of the information you had given her, before you disappeared without a trace. She sighed at your foolishness but part of her resonated with you, knowing she too would do anything for her love.  You sent Bakugou a 'I'll talk to you later' text, before taking apart your phone, leaving it under your pillow before grabbing your get away bag and leaving by train. His proposal haunted your every thought, and it drove you insane. He knew you were scared of commitment and heartache and yet he still asked you! You didn't blame him though. More so yourself. Nobody had made you talk to him about your troubles or reach out to him. You had given him your phone number. He could've left your company with new knowledge about the hero world and not about you, but he already had your heart and you had taken the opportunity to reconcile with your first love, regardless of whether it would leave you in ruins in the future. You were going to make this right. You were so utterly tired of the constant dull looming tide of sadness, doubt, anger. You wanted it to end, you really did. You had told Bakugou you were scared of dying. You were. But your greatest fear was losing him and you couldn't take it anymore. You raised your hand to knock and a large smile decorated your face. It had been a good month since you had last talked to him. You had set out to the remote countryside, searching for some young woman who had a curse removing quirk. 

You had gone with no expectations, telling yourself over and over again that you would be fine if it was unsuccessful. But deep down you knew you would be distraught if your current situation could not change.

The door opened to the blonde, his instantly furrowed his brows as his mouth hung open.

"Hey Katsuki." "Y-Y/N?" "I think I'm going to die-" "What?" he shouted, startling you. "Let me finish." you laughed. "I think I'm going to die in 50 or so years. Hopefully longer if that means I can be with you until old age." "W-what are you talking about?" he asked, confusion littering his face. "I'm no longer immortal." you grinned, before it fell slightly. "At least I think I am, the girl told me he got rid of the curse fully, but I’m not expecting too much." He continued to stutter, incoherent sentences falling from his lips as he fought back tears. "Surprise?" you asked, letting out a nervous chuckle. You started to grow worried at his reaction. You wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around him, but your feet stayed frozen in place, after all you had rejected him a month or so ago.   "Y-you got rid of your curse?" You nodded and he asked another question. "For me?" "Of course silly. Who else am I going to die with?" you laughed. His nose scrunched up as he tried desperately to comprehend the situation. "Aren't you scared?" "You'll be there with me right?" "Of course." he quickly said, nodding his head. "I thought." he trailed off and wrapped you up in his arms, head in the crook of your neck as his body shook with sobs. "I thought you left me." "I'm sorry." you said repeating it quietly over and over again. "I love you so much." "I love you too."

Taglist : 

@boku-no-family @toobsessedsstuff @renarderouges @thatonegeekchick @mrminyoongles @yourscorpiodaddy​

[blograzorwit]

Jest A Minute (5/10/2017) from Subroto Mukherjee

India's Top Magicians----------------------------------- Mumbai's BMC can work magic. Its favorite magic being the vanishing trick! Making thousands of incriminating files disappear into thin air! Same is true of our Mumbai University. It too can perform magic and make thousands of answer papers vanish! But of course the top magician in India today has to be the saintly and wizardly CM of UP. He just made a global icon -- the Taj Mahal --  disappear from the new tourist booklet issued by his state government!   *** Hands-On Editor------------------------ Finally, after 4 years, the Tarun Tejpal trial will begin in Mapusa, Goa. As you might know, Tejpal once headed a hard-hitting investigative journal and he was known as an impressive, hands-on editor. Well, his one mistake as a hands-on editor was to put his hands on the wrong female colleague! And -- WHAM -- our hands-on editor found himself headed for jail, his hands cuffed! *** Rest In Peace? No way!--------------------------------- As per his last wishes, Playboy founder Hugh Hefner was laid to rest next to Marilyn Monroe in an LA cemetery. So, rest in peace, Hugh. But now that you are sleeping next to Marilyn, I doubt you will get much peace or rest. . *** Co-starring With Marilyn------------------------------------ I bet Hugh wished he could have starred in a Hollywood movie with Marilyn but, alas, that never happened. No one in Hollywood came up with a plot for that. But never mind, now that Hugh is starring together with Marilyn in a plot anyway -- a funeral plot! *** Vatsayana Reincarnated?--------------------------------------- Appearing for his history exam, a  Rajkot school boy filled his answer paper with detailed porn! And guess what, his teacher gave him passing marks. Well, I guess he deserved that much. After all, he did show how well he knew a certain period of our history -- the period of Vatsayana and the Kama Sutra. *** Die Nasty?------------------ If it's found that his son is involved in drug dealing/trafficking, Philippines President Dutarte has declared that he will kill his own son! See, this is the difference between the Philippines and India. In India, nepotism rules and dynasties are supreme. And our dynasties are not about to die nasty. But if Dutarte means what he says, then -- WOW -- his own dynasty could die nasty at his own hands! Let's take a lesson from that, shall we? *** Finger-Licking Good------------------------------ Kejriwal-ji and leftist South Indian superstar Kamal Haasan met for lunch the other day. As the main course, they relished chewing out the BJP. Then they took delight in munching other right-wing parties to pulp. And, finally for dessert, they enjoyed making short-work the RSS! In other words, what a finger-licking treat for both! *** Campus Rumpus------------------------- There are boys who come to the Banaras Hindu University to study. And there are boys who come to study the girls. There are boys on the campus whose eyes pop out like telescopes at the sight of girls. Which shows these boys take interest at least in the subject of astronomy and 'heavenly bodies'! There are boys on the campus who admit that they can't help it. They are at an age when girls are always running through their heads. Hey, knowing the kind of boys they are, is it any wonder the girls are running -- away! *** Hopping Mad!----------------------- A CBI team was supposed to raid the home of an ex-judge involved in a medical scam in Odisha. Instead, this CBI team barged into the home of a sitting judge. Oh my God, I doubt if that poor sitting judge was sitting any longer. I bet His Eminent Honor was hopping mad! Such blunders make you wonder what the acronym CBI actually stands for : Coolly Barging In, Clueless Bungling Investigators? *** Emulating Our Great Leaders?-------------------------------------------- A central minister was on a visit to the Surat railway station. But the moment the honorable dignitary stepped on the newly installed escalator, it stopped working! Hey, can you blame the poor escalator? It was simply emulating our VIPs. After all, the moment our politicos become ministers, don't they stop working? *** Good Apple------------------- The new Bollywood film Newton has nothing to do with that genius Newton who, remarkably by the young age of 26, cracked all the basic laws of physics -- the laws of gravity, the laws of motion and the laws of optics. That Newton saw an apple falling and discovered the secret of gravity. On the other hand, you are quite likely to fall for our Newton because he is such a good apple! *** Laundering In The Bathroom? ------------------------------------------- In Mumbai, a top-level tax man was caught with lakhs of cash stashed in his bathroom! Why the heck did this fool store all that money in his washroom? What the heck was he planning? To launder his dirty money? To use his washing machine to clean all that dirty dough? Ha! ***   Our Stone Age---------------------- A dubious, stone-hearted music producer gets stoned.  Dangles a young musician from a high balcony. The poor young man falls like a stone to the stone-hard ground and ends up stone-dead! For junkies, it's dead easy to access drugs here in Mumbai. It's available on the Net. Or a drug dealer is just waiting to make a sale -- only a stone's throw away, especially if you live in a fancy, upscale area! So my question is, in the name of a modern lifestyle, have we regressed so far back that we are now actually living in the brutal Stone Age?   *** Caught Napping----------------------- They say our great metropolis of Mumbai never sleeps. But no, the same cannot said for our authorities and emergency services. And the recent tragedy at Elphinstone Road Station amply demonstrated how our authorities were caught napping. Even frantically calling up the emergency numbers only elicited the hum of slumber and snoring! Boy, it sure took time to rouse the royal Kumbha Karans who run this city! *** Laughing-Stock------------------------ Recently I was watching Mission Impossible. No, not the movie. On TV, I was watching the Pakistan mission at the UN desperately trying defame India with a WRONG PICTURE! Well, what do you know, it worked. Those Pakistanis succeeded. They succeeded in making a laughing-stock of themselves before the whole world! ***   Stuck In Medieval Time Warp------------------------------------------- Saudi Arabia has finally lifted its ban on women driving cars. But that country still has so many restrictions on women, it must be driving the women crazy! Women out there can't do this, can't do that, they can't do a hundred things. They can't go out unless draped from to top to toe and masked like dark comic-book superheros. They can't mix with men. A wife can't yell back at a hubby who yells orders to her all the time. She can't hit him back if he hits her. Heck, a woman can't even bark back at her pet dog when the dog barks at her! That's Saudi Arabia for you. So spectacularly ultra-mod in appearance but so rottenly backdated in its medieval mindset.   *** Mona Darling In Birthday Suit------------------------------------------ Now we hear that Leonardo da Vinci also painted a nude Mona Lisa. Hey, that must have been on her birthday when she was in her birthday suit. *** From everywhere folks flock to Las Vegas hoping to hit the jackpot. But it's too tragic for words when, far from hitting the jackpot, poor, innocent folks get hit by a crackpot! ***  

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Hello everyone.Last time on Hawkins Book Club, we learned what synchronicity actually is, time-traveling Neo-Nazis are sticklers for freshly cut grass, there was once a guy who flew around the US in a flying saucer with eight women to look for gold, the KKK uses magick, MK-Ultra actually was connected to Montauk, why the Demogorgon was attracted to Eleven, JFK’s brother liked to trip out on LSD with Nazi rapists, skinheads are actually kind, experienced aura-readers, Mark Hamill is literally the reincarnation of an alien from another universe, the Star Wars films are documentaries, there were Hitler-clones in existence, the Third Reich tried to access the Upside-Down (meaning that we could have had Stranger Things be about the Demogorgon murdering SS Stormtroopers and Hitler clones), Cthulhu and the Elder Gods are real, there could be a whole bunch of UFO-flying Nazis camped out in Antarctica and inside the Earth, George Bush’s dad was insane and there might be a good chance that Brenner is Eleven’s father.First of all, I would like to apologize for not updating this little review column thing last week. There wasn’t an E-book version of this book available, so I had to order a physical copy from a rather… um…. let’s just say “colorful” individual in Wisconsin. To my surprise, when it finally got here I discovered that it was signed by the author himself, so that’s a neat bonus. Speaking of which, the primary author of 1998’s Montauk: The Alien Connection is a new member to the Montauk Party; a guy named Stewart Swerdlow. Without further ado, let’s reconvene the Book Club and jump in.Our old friend Peter Moon writes the Introduction. Here he states that our education system has lied about the nature of space and time.“The biggest secret of time and space that has been unlocked is that these very components of our physicality can be manipulated. This is still a novel idea to conventional scientists, scholars and news media who are manipulated from birth. Manipulation of consciousness comes under the heading of ‘mind control,’ a subject which has never been fully embraced by major media.”Jesus Christ Moon, just let it go. I can’t believe that he’s STILL bitter over being blocked from television. Anyway, he says that mind control is integral to understanding space and time.“The human brain is actually a perfect computer which is fully capable of serving as a tool for cosmic enlightenment to its host. The problem is that this response in mankind has been short-circuited due to any number of various factors. These could include aliens, ancient priesthoods, religious indoctrination, youth groups and the CIA’s documented mind control project known as MK-Ultra. MK-Ultra was a 20th century ‘modernization’ of ancient techniques such as those employed by the ancient Assassins, a Middle Eastern cult during the Middle Ages who programmed subjects to kill through the use of hashish.”I’m starting to think that Ubisoft should be cutting this guy a check too. Anyway, Moon then goes on to claim that not only do truth serum drugs force people to spill their secrets, they also “can be used to tap the collective unconscious”, meaning that someone injected with them would suddenly have omnipotent knowledge about the entire universe… somehow. Moon suggests that we start asking people injected with truth serum about God, evolution “and the very nature of reality” because of this. He also touches on the head of MK-Ultra, Dr. Ewen Cameron and the LSD experiments, interestingly enough. He also states that Preston Nichols now believes that there were “Montauk Girls” in addition to the Boys and that there are literally hundreds of these programmed people all over Long Island. This leads into Moon introducing Stewart Swerdlow, the guy who was given the pseudo name of “Stan Campbell” in Montauk Revisited. You may remember him as the guy who shot Jesus in the face. Regardless, Duncan Cameron helpfully chimes in to say that this guy is an even more powerful psychic than he is. I didn’t know there was a sliding scale of psychic powers, but whatever.Chapter 1 talks about the 1943 Philadelphia Experiment which I’m sure you’re quite familiar with by this point, but it comes with a twist. It focuses on a Nazi named Johannes von Gruber. Why is he there? Well it turns out the Nazis were helping out the Americans with their teleportation.“Such an accomplishment would eliminate war on Earth because whoever controlled this technology would be invincible. The major governments of the world – the United States, Germany, Britain, Russian, and France – would then band together to eliminate the lesser powers and races of the Earth. They planned to beam vast conquering armies anywhere in the universe they desired. The new world government rule the known universe! For this the Reich was willing to unite with the United States. Because of the contacts that the Reich had with a certain group of ‘visitors,’ the United States was also willing to lay aside ideological differences. Each side believed that it would eventually control the entire plan.”………………………………………………………………………………There are so many things wrong with this paragraph alone that it would take an entire post just to point them all out. So I’m going to just move on.Anyway, the experiment actually starts and the shit immediately hits the fan; equipment starts sparking, men start falling overboard, people literally start melting into the floor. So von Gruber decides to jump overboard himself. He woke up at Montauk in 1960 and was immediately accosted by an American military officer and two grey aliens. They strapped him to a chair, gave him a brief update on how that whole “World War II” thing panned out, and another alien came in, tried to comfort him, and then immediately electroshocked him to death. He then rocketed up toward Heaven, complete with angelic guides (because I guess Heaven allows Nazis in now). He then experienced a life review,“Then he was told that he had to complete something on Earth. He was shown a woman in labor in a brand new hospital. The next thing he knew, he was inside a tube of light heading toward her.”Oh God, please tell me this isn’t going where I think its going.But of course, my prayers go unanswered. So cut to a woman named Eleanor giving birth to the author, Stewart Swerdlow. In an interesting synchronicity with Stranger Things, this guy was born on November 5th, 1956.Yes, you read that right, 1956.Somehow, the aliens or angels or whatever sent the Nazi back four years from 1960 to be reborn. No, that doesn’t make any sense, and I’m not going to even try to explain it. So while you’re trying to wrap your head around that, Swerdlow then claims that Yakov Sverdlov was his great-uncle. So how does the first Chairman of the Soviet Union relate to a reincarnated Nazi in the body of an American kid? Well, his grandfather helped form the Communist Party in America and his father worked on military projects in the Southwest. His mother was the daughter of a Gypsy in central Europe who had this experience;“When my grandmother was a little girl in Austria, she was playing outside with two cousins when she glanced up and saw the image of a man who looked exactly like the Jack of Spades in playing cards. Quickly, she told her cousins to look up at it. Immediately, they fell dead to the ground.”Way to go Grandma.“Shortly after that incident, my grandmother was sent to America to live with relatives. Amazingly, nearly a century later, I was involved with a group of government related individuals who were trying to understand the meaning of a message from hyperspace. Beamed from outside the Earth, the message was an image of a being who resembled the Jack of Spades!”Hey aliens, next time can you try making a message that doesn’t kill little girls? And maybe one that actually makes sense? Anyway, the rest of the chapter is just Swerdlow’s turn to recount his shitty childhood, and it’s somehow even worse than that of Nichols and Moon. First off, he said that he saw the spirits of the dead all over the place, there was a constant ringing in his ears, colors “flashed in his eyes” and he had glimpses of the future events that always came to pass. He was constantly frightened and suffering from nightmares. In addition;“Although brilliant in school, I found it slow-paced and boring. Usually I stayed home pretending to be sick, entertaining myself with psychic and mental games. Practically friendless, I found people my own age to be childish and stupid. Instead I preferred the company of the adults, particularly the elderly. For some reason, I enjoyed hearing stories about the old days, especially the 1930’s and 1940’s. I loved watching war movies, but I was ashamed to tell anyone that I always privately cheered for the Germans because my background is Jewish. Interestingly enough, I also cheered for Indians in Western movies.”So I guess this poor boy was still being influenced by his past fanatical beliefs and memories from his time as a loyal officer of the Nazi Party who was also psychic who could see the future, dead people, auras and “mind-patterns”. This seems like something that Stephen King would write, and to be honest I would probably read it. It got even worse for the poor kid as he was constantly being abducted by aliens and exposed to painful experiments by them.Chapter 3 describes one such abduction he experienced when he was six. So the aliens took young Stewart on a quick tour around the world and then brought him to an alien fleet and a council of aliens. Here, a giant butterfly telepathically explains that its species used its DNA to create Earth’s butterflies which are used to “monitor magnetism and know how to adjust it so that it has a beneficial effect on the environment (yes, really). Moths were created as a negative aspect of this by the “dark side.” The butterfly also explains that its species hitchhikes with humanoid aliens in order to populate other worlds and to adopt humanoid “spiritual students”, one of which was Stewart.“Finally, it said that it was time for me to communicate with the other beings, but it wanted me to know that for the rest of my stay on Earth, it would send Monarch butterflies to greet and comfort me. Whenever I saw a white butterfly at an opportune moment, there was a message for me. As the grand butterfly communicated with me, pulsating glows emanated from its beautiful wings.”Next time I see a butterfly, I’m crushing it to fend off these aliens. Stewart is then approached by a big white praying mantis which scares the hell out of him, and a fish person who states that humans had “marine origins”. He then passes out and re awakens in a chair surrounded by more aliens. First a lizard person explains that he is a defector of a massive empire trying to take over the galaxy. He states that thousands of years ago his people came to Earth in a ship that is now the moon. Another ship would come before the end of this century and reawaken the army currently in stasis underground after being defeated by the “Lyraen Empire”. These “reptilians” also maintain bases on Venus and other moons, reproduce mostly by cloning and state that Stewart will eventually convert them to “the Light” because his soul was already an emissary to them long ago. Next up is an alien literally described as looking like the Creature from the Black Lagoon. He claims that his people were the original inhabitants of Earth but were devastated by humans and aliens. However, pockets of them still exist in the deepest parts of the oceans, and they worked as liaisons between the Atlanteans and the whales and dolphins. Apparently these sea mammals are advanced races from another galaxy. I don’t know how advanced they could be if they are so easily hunted down by Japanese whalers, but whatever. Anyway, the Gill-men were transported to Neptune by other aliens.“Continuing, he told me that I have dolphin DNA; therefore, I could learn to communicate with his species in order to help mankind and the dolphin/whale systems.”Oh, so I guess Swerdlow will be the one giving us the heads up when the Vogons get ready to demolish Earth. Next, a Thin Man introduces himself as a representative of “the Federation of Planets”, which is composed of 120 member civilizations, and that they’ll let Earth join if we successfully fend off an invasion by the reptilian empire by ourselves. So I guess their membership requirements are a tad bit more stringent than the UN. He also explains that all of the alien races were speaking to young Stewart because they all contributed DNA to his creation, which his “soul-personality” already agreed to and traveled to other galaxies and alternate universes as training, and that there would be further conditioning in his new life. Seeing as how Stewart is getting all of this dumped on him at the tender age of six, he responds by vomiting all over the alien ambassadors (seriously). This didn’t really seem to faze them as a grey alien then steps over the puddle of vomit to inform the terrified boy that they will be regularly abducting him to check on him, because his body contained chemicals that the greys needed. He also informed Stewart that if his mission fails, then the other alien races would probably fight amongst themselves and bring their war to Earth. Again, Stewart was six when they told him this. At the same age you were worrying about your first day of Kindergarten, this kid was being told that if he screwed up, he would kick off an intergalactic war.So you know, no pressure!So then a Ethereal) identifies himself as a Sirian and tells him that the Sirians created the Egyptian civilization and gave the Torah to the Jewish people. They also created the Crystal Skull, so I guess this means that yes, there actually is a reason for aliens to exist in the Indiana Jones movies. They also possesses the most advanced technology in the universe and intentionally create conflict between the various races to foster evolution. Also, Stewart’s “soul-personality” came from them, so he’s simultaneously both a reincarnated alien and a Nazi. This particular Sirian said that his and the poor boy’s soul-personalities were linked, and he would serve as a guide. As Stewart got older, more memories of his past lives would emerge, and when his “alternate selves come together”, his mission would begin. Stewart was then unceremoniously dumped back in his bed, where he understandably woke up screaming in terror.After this, Stewart would have nightmares about the incident and began developing his psychic abilities. Some strange force compelled him to watch literally everything in the science-fiction genre and read about space travel.“My frustration grew as I realized that there was absolutely no one on the face of the Earth with whom I could converse. Invariably, I wanted to speak about my knowledge of what lay beyond physical reality but was afraid of others’ reactions. In those days (the late 50’s and 60’s), UFOs were still considered to be from the land of the mentally ill.”You know, as opposed to now where they’re accepted as scientific fact. When he got older, he started getting abducted almost every night to be instructed about “physical reality”, time travel and other topics. He woke up extremely exhausted the next morning each time. Because of this, in school he excelled in everything, but was bored and had no patience for other kids and people in general. One day when he was eleven, he was abducted by three greys and taken to a small room with a screen showing a conveyor belt. The aliens telepathically told him to watch pictures appearing on the screen and meat slices corresponding to them and asked to determine if he would eat it or not. This test went on for a bit with all sorts of creatures appearing on screen, and every time he would answer “yes” to something, the taste of it would appear in his mouth. He eventually got incredibly sick because of this and the aliens dumped him back in his bed, pissed because he didn’t finish the test. Stewart was disturbed as he realized that the aliens would have had to kill all of those creatures to get the meat, and one of the pictures was of a man.Chapter 4 talks about his teenage years. His family moved from Brooklyn to Suffolk County Long Island (My home county) and the abductions increased, but in an astral form. He frequently woke up naked in a large room on a bench with a group of other humans and they were educated on their roles as soldiers for the aliens. When Stewart was thirteen, he started “dreaming” about being abducted to a government facility where he was chased by military personnel. When he woke up, he would always see “the face of a blond man surrounded by red light” laughing at him from his bedroom window. He felt like the man was related to him. Also at this point he started undergoing some horrifying examinations by the greys, which are so fucking disgusting that I will not be retyping them here.At this point, he started having a “deep longing for children” and felt that he was a father who missed his kids. This feeling was confirmed when at seventeen he woke up strapped to chair (fully clothed instead of naked for once) and was approached by a grey and a “blond alien”, while two humans in military uniforms watched. He was shown a baby girl that was a hybrid between a human and grey, and was informed that she was his child cobbled together from his genetics. In fact, he fathered multiple children; some of which died and the others were taken to a “safe world”. He was shown this child because the aliens wanted to see if he would form a bond. He did, so the aliens kicked him back to Earth. After this he had the uncontrollable urge to heavily exercise and keep his body in peak condition. The aliens also put in a chip in his eyes that turned them into cameras and gave the aliens some control over where the eyes were directed, which in turned messed with his eyesight. They also started broadcasting his thoughts and past memories onto a screen in order to determine what his future would look like based on his “mind-patterns” during their abductions. The chapter closes out with Swerdlow revealing that the aliens started dumping him in Camp Hero at Montauk.Chapter 5 describes what he did there. It turns out he was dumped there since he was a prepubescent child, during which he was strapped to a table where he was “examined, mentally scanned for my brainwave signature or sexually abused in ways that stored my energetics and magnified them by computer. This went on until puberty.” Seeing as how he only tried to escape once and survived the testing, he was “promoted” by being placed in charge of the younger boys.“The preparation of the children included teaching them to implicitly obey orders, without any questions whatsoever. I taught them how to mentally focus on command so that their bodily energies could be removed by the psychic/mentalist to whom they were assigned. I instructed them on how to know what colors and symbols to mentally use to facilitate any given experiment. They were also taught how to relinquish their bodies and allow themselves to die without the innate defensive reaction of resistance inherent to all living beings.”This is horrifying. He also explains that there’s a difference between psychics and mentalists; the former can only read minds, but the latter can manipulate them. The kids were used to boost the energy of both types of people. The best subjects for this were in the three to twelve age range because their minds were “pure and uncontaminated”. However, their fear led to “scattered and disjointed energy outputs” that were useless to the scientists. And if that wasn’t bad enough, they were sexually abused by various project workers. You’d think the people running this place would prevent the pedos from having access to them because all of this drove many of the kids insane, and so they had to be “terminated”. So instead of giving the kids painless lethal injections, the scientists instead inexplicably shoved them into small chambers were they starved to death, and their bodies were dumped in the ocean. This just seems so unnecessarily evil and inefficient as hell. However, some of the staff would occasionally “adopt” a boy by reprogramming his memories and changing some of his physical features.Some of these boys were the children of politicians or military leaders who were abducted from their beds. They were treated differently from the other kids, and were always returned home, but not before getting implants placed in their eyes and programmed to fulfill unique tasks, which always included “tagging” other boys for use in the Project.The majority of the “expendable common boys” were taken from outside of New York, to alleviate suspicion over the disappearances. They came from all over the country.“Taken from families where they would not be missed as much as others, they were the children of prostitutes, drug addicts, and alcoholics, or they came from poor rural families with many children.”Holy shit, Monty Python was right too!Anyway, if for some strange reason the parents didn’t want to give their son up to bunch of sadistic aliens and Neo-Nazis, then Project people would arrange for an accident, ranging from cars driving into a river to house fires to full on natural disasters to fake the kid’s death. They also grabbed runaways off the street.In addition to the kids, they also grabbed a bunch of homeless people as well to travel through time and space. This tended to be a bit hit-and-miss as many of these people were lost in transit. So if someone did get through, they set up receivers to make transit easier by acquiring “vibrations”. These pathways were opened up by Duncan Cameron, and the Project people literally harnessed the kids’ imagination to boost his powers. When a boy “burned out” from being a living battery, they were exposed to a “fear program” that kicked their adrenaline into overdrive, which got a bit more energy out of them until they either died, went insane, or both. After that, their bodies were handed over to the greys, who proceeded to extract their organs and body fluids into large vats, in which they swam around in like the universe’s most fucked up pool to extract nutrients. Before humans just started handing over kids to them, Swerdlow claims that the aliens created vampires and chupacabras to extract nutrients for them. Occasionally reptilians would show up to watch the mind control experiments. Of course, Swerdlow feels completely awful over his role in all of this and is still plagued by guilt.Chapters 6-8 describe his travels around the Middle East. But first, he described how he hated with a passion, yet studied accounting because he was programmed to do so to help manage the Montauk boys. Also, he nearly died after being injected with sodium pentathol during a wisdom tooth removal. He believes this was because the anesthesia is used in truth serum as well.So he was “compelled” to take an overseas trip “sponsored by a Zionist organization that sought to bring volunteers to Israel and promote colonization of the arid land there.” Essentially, he was going to work on a communist farm called a “kibbutz”. On the way there, he stopped in Italy where the volcano at Pompeii unlocked some his memories of a past life, and a “French woman with Italian citizenship” randomly decided to try and convince him to become a medical doctor and marry her daughter, as one does. When he arrived in Tel Aviv, he was overcome with emotion, but found himself starting at departure board for Teheran, Iran for nearly an hour. He was then compelled to look at departure boards for Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, Nairobi, Kenya and Johannesburg, South Africa until his kind-of-an-asshole program companion got his attention. They waited with three women for a while until a guy came to pick them up. He drove them to Jerusalem where the women were dropped off at a youth hostel and Swerdlow and his companion were dumped at an old, empty British army barracks, where they told to sleep in a cell. When Swerdlow fell asleep, he woke up back at the airport, boarding a plane to Teheran. What follows is a series of flashes in which Swerdlow finds himself in a cave, more naked examinations, a “hyperspace subway system that circled the globe”, a shitty Nairobi bathroom, more examinations and a Sirian who told Swerdlow that he was an ambassador to the Israelis as their ally. Finally, he woke up back in Jerusalem.The next day, a van drove him and his companion to a poor kibbutz called Gvar Am in the Gaza Strip. The trip there was awful, because in Swerdlow’s own words; “Israelis do not drive their cars, they aim them.” He slept in a crappy house and worked in pear groves until the afternoon, “but not before some of the Scottish volunteers became exhausted and passed out from the heat.” He also made a friend with a British guy, whom he later found was an agent for both British and Soviet intelligence. How that’s supposed to work, I have no idea. Regardless, Swerdlow then decides to go meet some relatives in the town of Holon. His bus driver dropped him off, but he had no idea where his relatives actually live, so he wandered around until he literally stumbled into the house of the husband of his grandmother’s cousin.Chapter 8 describes how while wandering the Negev desert, Swerdlow was abducted by the Sirians. They told him that the Hebrews were created by them, and that they were currently trying to “purify” the modern Israelis by altering their mind-patterns. They examined him yet again and showed him his true identity. He was then taken to Mars, where he saw a large group of human men shackled together and digging with shovels. A Rigel alien explained to them that seeing as how they fulfilled their service on Earth and Mars, they would be examined for transportation to Rigel. If they failed the examination, they would be “eliminated.” This whole event was apparently orchestrated just for Swerdlow. He was then taken to the Sirians home world of Khoom, a frozen and snowy world devastated by an ancient war. Here, nine beings called “the Ohalu Council” inform him that he originally sent his soul-personality to Earth and that there were nine other people on Earth like him, each directed by a council member. They remind him of the upcoming war with the reptilian Draco and reveal that just like the CIA in Afghanistan, they also gave weapons to the Draco, who proceeded to use the weapons against them. Swerdlow also discovered that the Ark of the Covenant was actually a communication device between the Sirians and the Hebrews. The Sirians then dumped him back in the desert, three days after he left.“I believe that the Sirians are trying to undermine the plans of all factions involved on Earth; the New World Order, the Draco, the Greys, the Tall Blonds, etc. Their agenda is to bring all events to a climax, then usurp all power, possibly via the Israelis. This is only speculation on my part. Time will tell.”I’m sure it will. Chapter 9 discusses his return to the U.S. Here he reveals that as a young man one of the experiments he was a part of was “The Marriage Project”, which was designed to mate the Montauk boys with specific girls to produce specific children. So the twenty-two year old Swerdlow was matched with a fourteen year old Mia from Massachusetts who “was part of my own frequency”, because their soul-personalities were once one and split off long ago. They then proceeded to have sex while a literal crowd of people watched. Two years later, this happened;“One evening, when Mia was sixteen and I was twenty-four, we were brought together in a clinical environment under the watchful eyes of scientists. Here it was explained that our genetics were perfectly aligned with sequences that were reciprocal to one another. Mia had more Pleiadian genetics; mine were Sirian. This combination would produce a child of unusual abilities. Brought naked into a white room, we made love three times in succession. The entire episode was dreamlike and almost a blur. At the end, I knew inside of myself that Mia was pregnant.”This is so fucked up.So this produced a girl named Jaime, which Swerdlow was prevented from seeing in order to “avoid contamination of her mind-patterns”. She can see the future and “all possible alternate realities”, but at the time of the time of the writing, she was a teenager who didn’t know about her potential. Swerdlow is currently trying to guide her, while she understandably tries to avoid him.Chapter 10 describes how Swerdlow got a job as an internal auditor with a pharmaceutical company. Somewhat hilariously, he actually starts complaining that he has to get up for work in the morning during one of his abductions. During this, his captors tell him that his “marriage” with Mia was over, and that he should go out and live a “conventional life”. So he met with a secretary in the company named Michele, who he detested because she was “nasty and opinionated” with a short temper. However, they were both mind-controlled to marry each other after only a month. They also aborted a child they produced because Michele “did not want to look pregnant when she walked down the aisle.” Swerdlow is sad that he didn’t stop her, and gives the “truth” about abortion;“I now believe that abortion is wrong unless the mother’s life is in danger or the pregnancy is the result of rape. I also understand that the soul-personality does not enter into the body until the first breath, but it is that soul-personality, and no one else, that must decide whether or not to continue the life-stream. People who do not want children should take the proper precautions before the pregnancy, not destroy a possible life-stream after it is created. Although this may sound fundamentalist to some, it is what I know to be the proper way.”Ah, so it shouldn’t being the choice of the mother, the father or the government as to whether a fetus should be aborted, but the choice of the fetus itself, of course!This book.The two had more fights after this and wanted to call off the wedding, but Swerdlow received a telepathic message saying that the marriage would not be permanent, Swerdlow already agreed to it, and “This woman had agreed to be the vessel for the entry of my children into the physical plane.” I have no idea why Michele agreed to marry him, but they did marry and moved to Patchogue, Long Island.Chapter 11 talks about the strange events that occurred at their house. For whatever reason, they usually happened when Swerdlow’s in-laws were staying over. Their house was broken into, but only things that had little value were stolen, they were constantly hearing footsteps in their house, young children tried to break into the house (which he responded to by setting up a six-foot tall fence and alarm system), he saw shadowy figures in the house, the abductions continued and a wire was shoved into his penis, two disembodied robot heads had a conversation over his bed, you know, the usual. He also describes how during one of his abductions a human/grey hybrid young girl was shown to him, and he was told that she was his daughter. His house was also “attacked” several times by black military helicopters that didn’t really do much other than mess with the electronics and radios in the house. His wife was also having dreams of abductions as well, during which she was checked for pregnancy. Every time she had this dream, she became pregnant soon after.This brings us to Chapter 12, which is about Swerdlow’s children, all of whom were delivered via Caesarean-section. The first, Matthew was born in 1983 and was constantly crying, and his parents both had dreams of him being abducted. A couple of months after his birth, Swerdlow was informed during an abduction that his children were “not under my jurisdiction” because they were part of the experiments, and he would have to hand them over. Swerdlow actually grows some balls for once and tells them to fuck off. However, by the time Matthew was seven, he began talking about how a tall, red-eyed man dressed in black came into his room at night and telepathically said that he came from the underground, and that Matthew came from the underground as well, and that his parents were being monitored. Matthew described to his father about how there were cities underground and was able to describe a relay system. He was also abducted by grey aliens, who handed him a space bazooka and told him that he would use it in that upcoming intergalactic war, and that he would get dragged into the same genetic experiments as his dad. Swerdlow also reveals that Matthew was the only kid who inherited his psychic abilities. His second son, Jeremy is probably the most normal person in the entire family, the only strange thing that happened to him was that a grey alien would occasionally come into his room at night and take some of his toys.Next came Daniel. During the pregnancy, the doctor informed his parents that he may be born with Down’s Syndrome. After that, Swerdlow had an abduction during which this happened;“A female grey came into the room holding a small bundle. No one told me that she was female. I simply knew that ‘it’ was a she. As she approached, a male voice said that she wanted to show me something. Slowly unwrapping the top of the blanket, the female revealed an adorable blond-haired baby. The male voice said that it was mine, and asked if I wanted to hold it. Replying that I did, the female started to unwrap the whole baby, revealing an octopus-like torso with legs instead of a human body. Screaming and crying at the same time, I told them to take it away. The same voice said that it was going to an aquatic world and that I would never see it again. Waking up in my bed, I prayed with all my might that Danny would be a normal child. I cannot describe my relief when the doctor called with the positive test results.”So Swerdlow essentially disowned one of his children just because it looked like a complete abomination against God. What a dick.“When Danny started to talk, he told me about a man with a clown face who came into his room at night to take him flying. He said that when the man put a magic wand in the middle of his forehead, they immediately were in a place that had balloon lights of different colors.”So underground inhabitants, aliens, clowns with magical powers, balloons…..…Are the Swerdlow kids getting stalked by Pennywise?)Anyway, the clown took Daniel to see his “baby sister”, who ended up scratching his face with claws. Also, the kid can talk to angels. Not aliens masquerading as angels, but real, honest-to-God angels who tell him the future. This is just casually tossed in on the last paragraph as an afterthought with no elaboration.Chapters 13-14 are about Swerdlow’s CIA application, which was already covered in Montauk Revisited, so I’ll just breeze through it. He simply answered a “Help Wanted” ad in the newspaper, was told that he would be valuable due to his knowledge of ten languages, was asked a barrage of questions during the events described in Montauk Revisited and was declined by the CIA because he was a security risk.Continued in Part 2 via /r/StrangerThings